End Of Life ...

I am still recovering from a sight no one should ever have to see.

A Mac truck ran over a person today, killing them.  It happened on a regular corner that I habit a lot.  The "blood curdling" screams were mind altering.

Roads blocked off; police cars every where; emergency vehicles on the scene.

Just having the vision of the body, lifeless, is more than I can stomach.

To posit a commentary ... why do those that are in four wheel vehicles have such disdain for us that are bi-peds?

So in a hurry to cut corners, at the expense of life?

The driver of the mac truck was making a right turn on a green light (going east) while the pedestrian had the right of way (going north).

Personally, I was the victim of a similar travesty.  If it was a mac truck that ran over me, I, too, would be dead.

The Santa Monica shooting over-shadowed this tragedy, today.

My Diary Entry Before Going To The Psych Hospital, Part 2

“Well, in hospital now, am going to be placed on an involuntary 72 hour psych hold. So much for being able to take care of myself. Guess when I get out, hell, I’ll be homeless. Great. So much for the system. Zaire tried to make me promise not to kill myself, and I am unable to grant him his wish. I don’t want to keep any of this up anymore. No job, no friends, part time daughter, zero time grandson – NO MONEY!!!! I just can’t believe (name withheld) has been ignoring me for days and (name withheld) blew me off and didn’t stop by tonight to pay me. And still I worry about my clients. Now I can’t do the work for (name withheld) and they will not know what happened to me or why I don’t text or call back. And of course (name withheld) is off to El Salvador so he will be useless as usual. Three days locked up in hospital – how weird is that going to be? I didn’t give the doctors any emergency call numbers so it will be interesting if anyone will be able to find out where I am. My daughter said she had to go home to sleep because she had work tomorrow. Great. Threw my cell phone in the garbage at home. Disconnected my Vonage phone and threw it into the garbage. Don’t know if anyone will find them. Turned off the cell anyway. Pretty sure I will be all alone, as usual. Nothing is going to change for the better. It is only going to get worse. Man, the Tony Scott suicide really got me going. Of course, I am afraid of heights, so no chance of that happening. But what does one do when one finally becomes useless in life, family, work and society as a whole? If I don’t make a difference anymore, what is the point? Everything points to a nothing life at this stage. I miss Zaire so much every day. I hate (name withheld) for what he has done to my daughter, Zaire and me. He’s a crude piece of shit and I want my grandson back. How strange it feels to be alone even when I’m in a hospital for trying to kill myself. NO ONE HERE. You’d think at lease one person would care. Ya think? Why can’t I just be at peace and go? Even my daughter had a score of people with her at the hospital when she tried to OD!!! But me? No one. Figures. At least I made out my last will but since I gave everything to Zaire, pretty sure my daughter will just rip it up. Oh well." [at this point, the hospital staff took my pen away, indicating it could be used to harm myself].

I had not been transferred to the psychiatric hospital yet. There are a few more entries before I got there.

Since I have been out, and finally got through the Labor Day weekend, I was at the clinic I was directed to go to, by 6:45 a.m., and I ended up leaving the clinic around 3:15 p.m., almost nine hours. But -- I ended up with a psychiatrist, a therapist, prescriptions for proper medications, and appointments to come back next week with the therapist, and in three weeks, with the psychiatrist. And for those following this saga, my guilt ridden ex-boss donated the balance due on my rent so I was able to get that weight off my shoulders.

Tomorrow, I will attend my first real AA meeting. Not sure what to expect. I hope to find a sponsor, just in case there is some need in the future. I am detoxing extremely well off alcohol, only slight shaking of the hands, and that's it. Not bad for someone who drank as much as I did daily for as long as I did.

It's taken a few days to adjust to the medications. I have not needed to take any of the anxiety pills, just the depression medicine and the nightly sleeping pills, which, by the way, I have enjoyed my first full night of sleep in YEARS!!! For anyone interested in major depressive disorder, here is a nice explanation over at Wikipedia, where you can see, not everyone who is diagnosed with MDD drinks, but just about everyone with MDD will at some point in time, attempt suicide. It is interesting to note that my regular physician failed to catch any of my obvious symptoms (or anyone else for that matter), despite the fact that I was screaming out loud that I did not want to live, and fuck, I even told my grandson who is barely 10 years old! Can you say "oblivious?"

Now, on the bright side, I am eating, which is something that almost completely disappeared from my life. I practically had to force myself to just eat one meal in the evening, and that was only because I was concerned how my body would react to the alcohol if there was no food in my body. How's that for stupid?

I haven't been totally oblivious to the conventions. However, I was in the psych hospital during the RNC so no one was interested in THAT facility to watch. Since I have been out, I've been able to see the DNC on CNN, but I have been able to see the highlight speeches from the RNC based on You Tube videos and other various news outlets. I'll get back to my political posts soon. Gotta say though, and you all know I don't belong to any party, and as much as the guy sold the democrats out, I so enjoyed Bill Clinton's speech. "The DNC also surpassed the RNC in ratings; even competing with the opening night of NFL football, more people tuned in to Bill Clinton’s DNC speech than the second half of the Cowboys-Giants game." (Raising hand, yes, I too, did that)

My Diary Entry Before Going To The Psych Hospital, Part 1

“Now I find myself in a hospital. It is just too bad I sent that e-mail out too soon. I hope I can get out of here – but now the valium will not be a choice as I am sure my prescription will be void. How to just go to sleep? Must research other ways – maybe some booze and carbon monoxide. I hate pain so I can’t do this by slits, hangings or other shit. Regardless, no one is going to pay my rent. No one can take care of me. Why should it even matter? Why can’t we just have good ways to go instead of those horrible ways like guns, ropes and knives? When you are no longer useful, what is the point? When no one gives a shit, what is the point? When your family is not there, what is the point? I don’t hate life. I just hate my life. I want Zaire back. It is worth it if I can’t see him again. I blame (name not printed, but the father) mostly for my two years of pain. Taking Zaire away for no reason and not allowing me to be a part of his life, at 60, fuck you. I already told Zaire I would kill myself, so live with that. I certainly would rather be a spirit on Zaire’s shoulder then just a memory that fades in time. (Daughter’s name withheld), I know you will hurt the most. Your dad hates you and I will be successful at some point, and unfortunately you will be all alone. I am sorry but we are not that close so you will get over it. After the experience with (name withheld, short term roommate) in my home and then his leaving ... any thoughts of going homeless are not appealing. Sooner or later that is all I have left. Homelessness and hopelessness. (Name withheld) and (name withheld), thanks for not being there for me. Supposed to change from pj’s to hospital gown. Guess I’ll be under a psych hold. So much for working on (name withheld) cases!!! Ha ha. Should have stopped by and paid me instead of cruising off to El Salvador. I’ve waited too many times for you to come by.”

That was the last entry after I was interrupted in my attempt at suicide, but before I was put on the 72 involuntary psychiatric hold. I guess one can see the despair in the writings. Now that I have had time to go over my actions, as well as the actions of those around me, it is clear that certain people (uh, family, you ALL know who you are) were so fixated on the fact that I drink, and completely either oblivious or just not caring about my depression, that they have no clue how I felt.

These past three days without medication brought me back to the same place I was before. Except, I don't feel, necessarily, hopeless. The depression came back with a vengeance, but I have been holding up because I am supposed to hit the clinic tomorrow (gotta go to bed early because I have to get up at 5 so I can be at the clinic by 7:30). It's a full service clinic, with psychiatrists, therapists, and a pharmacy to fill my prescriptions. Right now, all I have is the script for the sleeping pills and the anti-depressant, nothing for the anxiety. I was supposed to get one, but since I THOUGHT I still had the valium script, the psychiatrist at the hospital said it would be cheaper then the Ativan I was taking. But who knew my evil daughter would talk to my personal physician, steal my prescription (yeah, like everyone but those with experience with what is wrong with me are making personal diagnosis) and upon getting released, I went to my doctor who told me he talked to my daughter (ok, whatever happened to doctor/patient privilege?) and he would not give me a new script. Great. Hopefully, at the new clinic, besides what I got a script for, based on what I was taking at the hospital, I will get some Ativan. Between those three drugs, I was able to become stable and my mind did not fart all over me. I felt strong and in control to a certain extent. At least, I could figure out how to work and do stuff, instead of the last month of being in bed all day and pretending I was doing things. Suffice it to say, I will not be going back to THAT doctor again. Fuck him. That was so unprofessional, I could actually file a complaint against him, but I don't have the energy to seek revenge or anything.

Well, the only "revenge" I have taken is against my daughter. I threw away her complete file that I had for the past 18 months of the custody battle. Yup, I did that. I told her criminal attorney I did that. He was surprised, but then again, not surprised. Also, my daughter has been violating her probation, and I told him about it. He was pissed because he put his reputation on the line to get her the diversion on her four criminal counts of assault on a minor, PLUS he got the DA not to count the DUI she got six months after the criminal charges were filed not to count as a violation of any probation. I'm the drunk, supposedly, but she drinks mimosas in the morning, does beer in the afternoon, and hard alcohol at night! And let's not forget the pipe in her purse, the one hitter, and the weed. Last time I made her and I take a tox screen, she failed, but I passed, insofar as drugs were concerned.

I know I can't stand the father, but the more I think about my daughter and her relationship with me, and her inattention to her son (she does not call him every day, but if it was ME, I'd be calling him five times a day, damn it), I am coming to the conclusion that maybe, just maybe, he's better off right now living with the father as opposed to living with the bitch troll from hell, as me and my friends have affectionately referred to her since she was 16 (see Absolutely Fabulous for reference as to BTFH).

Wish me luck. Hope I get accepted by the clinic and get my meds, especially since they took about a day and a half to kick in. I need to feel normal soon.

My Suicide Diary Notes, Before They Took Me Away

“Thinking a lot of Tony Scott. Why? Seems to be the question. Even Jr. Seau. Why? Life isn’t always meant to be fulfilled as it relates to what others think YOUR life should be lived. Sometimes – there just isn’t anymore to do. Me, I can’t do harm to myself the way Tony did. Can’t feel pain or I won’t be able to go through with it. But I have been contemplating suicide by just falling gently asleep. I find it funny I always joked that I would go out using morphine but I can’t keep it down. Valium is easier – I just – want to go to sleep and not wake up in this earthly state.”

That was the first entry in my suicide diary. I thought it would probably be my last, but then, as you all know, I was interrupted in the sleeping process by lots of banging on my door, LOUD fucking banging and things thrown at my windows and people screaming my name. I didn't want to open the door, but I also didn't want them to break it down. Sort of caught between done and not quite finished.

I'll follow up with more entries from my diary, as the next entry starts with me being in the hospital where the paramedics brought me right away, but before I was sent to the psychiatric hospital.

Mitt's Dog On Shuttle, (Not To Be Confused With Santorum's Man On Dog)

Ok, this is just too funny NOT to share!


Obviously, that's a Mittens take of his dog on the roof of the car!

Here are some earlier pictures I have in storage of the shuttle being transported back to home base after a mission.

Talk About A Small Apartment - Yet 24 Rooms!

This is an interesting YouTube about how one person's creativity can change a very small space (approximately 300+ square feet).



I've always been creative with small spaces since I started living in studios back in 1995.

Oh, Shut The Fuck Up, Tony Perkins

If I hear or read the terms "activist justices" and "liberal social agenda" one more time, I will literally jump out of my skin, and in my ethereal state, hurt someone.

Those two phrases have got to be the most over used memes by the right wing nut jobs EVAHHH.

They are made up phrases meant to, oooohhhh, scare people into thinking that certain, ah, judges are forcing the American people into, uh, liberalism (the belief in the importance of individual liberty and equal rights) and socialism.

Every time there is a step forward these past ten years or so, the nut jobs pull out the phrase "liberal social agenda" to put a damper on the advancement, and try to scare people back into the dark ages. And then, of course, any judge that doesn't rule the way our current SCOTUS (the right leaning sons of bitches, pardon my language to the females on SCOTUS) that ruled for more and easy eminent domain, the erosion of individual rights over corporate rights, the disastrous Citizens United ruling, and all their other rulings that have been turning this country backwards, is then called an "activist judge" and the nut jobs go around advocating either recalling or killing the judge.

There is such a lack of connect with respect to the three branches of the government, why you'd almost think that these people never learned anything about government when they were in school! Which, is probably true, since as a country, we are turning out stupider and stupider graduates. I hate Jay Leno's show, and have rarely watched it, but when he first was on, the bit he did about asking people of the street just general knowledge questions, like how many moons orbit the earth, and he gets answers like "two, three" or "I don't know," while one laughs ... it's still proof of how stupid the general public really is.

And that's why those terms, "activist judges" and "liberal social agenda" gets such a rise out of these stupid people. Without these so called activist judges (many of whom are actually conservative, but just believe in JUSTICE) pushing a so called liberal social agenda (again, it's just JUSTICE), we would not have equal rights for people of color (we don't really, but we are supposed to), females would not have ever been given the right to vote, and a whole host of other rights that the nut jobs don't believe we should really have would not have been ORDERED.

So the next time you hear those phrases, do me a favor and slap the person silly. Show them your freedom of speech by slapping the shit out of them.

For the record, this rant is courtesy of the feigned outrage over the federal judge who finally ORDERED the Obama Administration to stop discharging our soldiers over DADT, and the ever crazy Tony Perkins' rant urging Obama's group to "appeal, appeal, appeal."

Such a move would carry risks, said Richard Socarides, who was an adviser to President Bill Clinton on gay rights issues. “There will be an increasingly high price to pay politically for enforcing a law which 70 percent of the American people oppose and a core Democratic constituency abhors,” he said.

Critics of the ruling include Tony Perkins, the president of the Family Research Council and a proponent of the don’t ask, don’t tell law, who accused Judge Phillips of “playing politics with our national defense.”

In a statement, Mr. Perkins, a former Marine, said that “once again, an activist federal judge is using the military to advance a liberal social agenda,” and noted that there was still “strong opposition” to changing the law from military leaders.

First off, Mr. Socarides is incorrect in stating that 70% of the American public is against DADT. Once again, these nut jobs just say things that aren't true and our wonderful media just let's them do it. This has been going on for years now that it has replaced true journalism, and reduced it to "note taking and typing." We are like the last civilized (and I use that word ever so loosely) that has this kind of ban on gays serving in the military, and the fear mongering and boogey man theories are just not supported by the military of these other countries that have for years and years worked alongside gay and lesbian troops. In fact, our own military got along just fine before DADT became the law (thanks Clinton, for that piece of shit order), and it has only caused quality military personnel to be "outed" in all kinds of inane ways, and discharged. This is a voluntary military at the moment, involved in two major wars, and preparing to invade not one but probably two more countries in the future, and if that's the course our supposed leaders want to take, then they need every qualified volunteer. Weeding out the gays and lesbians does nothing to help the military. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. It's been so debunked, the "I don't want to be next to a gay person in the shower," or the "I don't want to be in a bunker next to a gay person," etc. comments and theories. They don't hold water.

Obama ran on repealing DADT and all his Administration has done is support not repealing it. High five to the "activist" judge that has ORDERED the President to stop discharging soldiers based on DADT.

UPDATE: I just read that the Obama Administration WILL appeal both the injunction and the ruling that DADT is essentially illegal. Nice going there, Mr. Drama Obama.

I really hope the powers that be force a change in congress so that the Drama man gets what he really wants ... an excuse for his do nothing Administration, and the falling into the abyss of craziness that the teabaggers will bring to this country, all of which I will lay at the feet of our (holding nose) President.

GET OVER IT, NUTJOBS, AND LET CORDOBA HOUSE EXIST

It's good to see all the "professional" left bloggers on top of this Cordoba House bullshit and calling out Harry Reid and others for their "stupidity" (my word, though I don't "own" it, I will stand on my "stupid" posts as pre-dating the new "stupid" meme that seems to be turning up on a lot of big political blogs, ahem).

No imbed, but view this video here.

"Fueling a national debate?" Debate? National? I think not.

"Park 51 is a community center that will be serving all of lower Manhattan. That's going to be helping in the revitalization of lower Manhattan. It's going to establish much needed jobs. It's going to help establish much needed construction jobs. This is a community center that is going to help us understand New York and the world that we live in."

This is a MUST SEE video. As Keith Olbermann says, this is the "non news that Republicans want you to focus on."

I'm glad to hear that the people responsible for building this community center are not backing down. I am sick and tired of the stupid, stupid, stupid people in America that want to place the label of terrorist upon all Muslims (um, didn't some white guy with a beef against the IRS recently fly his little airplane into an IRS building, but HE'S not a terrorist?).

As noted by Olbermann's show tonight, this Cordoba House crap (non story) is being pushed mainly by the right wingers in order to avoid having the people of America talk about what is really the problems relevant to Americans at this point in time, like really, really high unemployment, the economy, oil spills in the Gulf, etc. You get the drift. Find something that's a hot button that will take you off script, the Republicans will go with it.

Holy Shit! Talk About Security

Man, like seven to ten cop cars, sirens blazing, pull a car over at the gas station across the street, and the cops come out of their vehicles with GUNS DRAWN. I saw rifles, for god's sake! Shit!

Took my video camera out. Ran downstairs. By then, the guns were holstered, the perps handcuffed. Still don't know what they were pulled over for. A guy and a girl. The girl was cuffed and put into one car, the man was cuffed, but he was left standing outside of a car, waiting. Finally, after about 15 to 20 minutes, he was put in a car.

Not sure what's up, or how long they will be there. Here comes another cop car as I am typing, I can hear the siren.

Seems Many Aren't Missing Bush, And More DINO Senate Action (Or Inaction)

Seems someone is not missing him!

And now back to our sorry ass government, that still isn't working even after the above dufuss left.

It seems that for what it's worth, the Democratic party's worst enemy in the Senate are the Democrats themselves. Pretty sad, don't you think?

Our government isn't working. That seems obvious to most Americans. And, the big problem is the Senate. The GOP's obstructionist tactics have prevented that body's ability to solve some of our nation's glaring problems. But, instead of trying to fix the filibuster, several Senate Democrats are enabling the obstruction by blocking efforts to change the rules.

People like DINO Feinstein, Akaka, Pryor, Tester and Ben Nelson (all DINOs) have an excuse to "keep things just as they are." First off, things aren't working just as they are. It is supposed to be a "majority" rule in the Senate, and that means 51 votes. But because of the Republican threat to filibuster every fucking bill, the vote threshold was pushed to 60 votes (to override a filibuster) during the Bush years, and now it is the status quo to get ANY FUCKING bill passed. That's not how the Senate is supposed to work, but leave it up to the Democratic party to show the American people what dysfunctional looks like. At least the Party of No sticks together!

And people wonder why I'm not voting anymore? Why vote when the schmucks we do vote for can't tell their assess from their constituents.

"Seat Hogs"

Brooke Timmons grasped a bar in the middle of a crowded Red Line rail car and held on, looking exasperated as she tried to keep her balance while the train jerked and accelerated down the track.

On both sides of Timmons sat riders referred to on commuter Web sites as "seat hogs." A man and woman occupied aisle seats with empty spots beside them but made no move to slide over and offer Timmons a seat.

Reading this piece from the Washington Post, and I realize that "seat hogging" is apparently universal. I ride the Metro here in Los Angeles, and my pet peeve are those riders that refuse to sit in the back of the bus, but, stand in the doorway. There could be as many as eight empty seats, but three or four people will crowd the standing room in front of the exit door such that you have to shove people out of the way just to get off the bus! I don't find too many seat hoggers on the buses, but on the subways and trains, I do see them more, especially during crowded rush hour riding. I take the subway every other Friday after work to North Hollywood to pick up my grandson, and by the time the subway gets to my stop on its way to NoHo, I have to stand because there are generally no seats. The trip itself is not long, approximately 20 minutes, so I don't get too bothered. But it bothers me for other people, the mommies with their babies and strollers, the elderly (ok, so I am considered on the elderly side LOL), and others, that (1) men don't relinquish their seats for the women and (2) the younger kids take up two seats with their bags and stuff.

Since I ride regularly, there are a few "riders" on my bus to work that generally sit in the aisle seat and refuse to let anyone get "inside" to sit. I've seen one elderly black lady go bonkers on a guy that tried to sit there. The poor man actually started arguing with the woman, and she was like "oh no you ain't gonna sit next to me." He finally moved on, and a bit later, the old woman let some younger woman sit in the seat

Then we have the crazy woman who jumps up and down in her seat, hitting her back with an empty water bottle, and shouting profanity, in between moments of sanity where she might say something to someone near her like she said to me one day ... "hey, I like you pants, where did you buy them?" Every now and then, a bus driver will tell her she has to calm down or he'll have to ask her to get off the bus, and she is like, "ok, sorry," and sits quiet for a moment, but then starts jumping up and down in her seat, and hitting herself again. I've seen this woman on my bus for probably the past three years. She's obviously homeless because she pulls up onto the bus her homemade carry all, which can, at times, block the aisle. I don't begrudge the homeless from taking the bus or train, and carrying their "home" with them ... it's the only form of transportation actually available. It's not like they have a car. Hell, I don't have a car!

There are all kinds of interesting and/or weird people who ride the bus, though. Yeah, there are the regular commuters using the system to get to and from work, many of whom have cars but use the bus to save on gas and parking fees. I ride it because I live centrally to just about any route N/S/E/W that, aside from the occasional longer than usual wait, I can hop a bus or a train or a subway and be at a destination without much hassle and almost equally as fast as if I was driving in a car. But the weird ones go from cracking me up to down right scary.

I've been on the metro a handful of times when fights have broken out and weapons drawn, and everyone runs to the front of the bus to get off (why is it always at the back of the bus that this shit happens anyway?). Then there was the time this guy got on, sat in the back (I have a habit of sitting in the last row, and next to the window if I can), and boy he stunk to high heaven of SHIT. Not just smelly like some of the homeless men and women smell, but of pure doo doo in his pants. One by one, we all moved to the front of the bus, and then again, one by one, we all started yelling at the man to get off the fucking bus and at least go to a gas station and hose off his damn feces. Finally, the bus driver made him get off the bus. We were all spraying our perfumes and other "smelling" devices on the bus just to get rid of the "poop aroma." The driver finally said he was taking his bus in and exchanging it for a new one for that day!

One time, this young black kid gets on the bus, and he goes for the back row. This time, I am not sitting in the back, but two rows from the back door, and a young Hispanic lady is sitting next to me (a student, not high school, older), and in front of me in the two seats, one is occupied by a young Hispanic man with a green "Subway" sandwich store shirt on, and the seat next to him empty. Then this black dude gets up from his seat in the back and sits down next to the guy in front of me, and spreads his legs out in an expansive position such that, of course, he touches the guy next to him. I hate it when guys sit down and do that. Anyway, he starts calling the guy next to him (in the Subway shirt) a "fag," "homo" and other derogatory terms, and acts all like the guy tried to touch him. The woman next to me was like, chill dude, and the bus driver I can see is looking through his mirror to see if there is a problem. The black guy moves again to another seat, this time across the aisle from me. He continues with his shouting obscenities and then starts in on the woman next to me. By this time, I start to chime in with some profanities of my own telling him to shut the fuck up. Then he starts in on me with his "I'm packing and I'm gonna fuck you up old lady." I swear, I stood up, stared straight at him, did the hands on the chest pump and said "bring it on, fucking asshole, bring it ... show me your big ass gun dipshit." That's when the bus driver starts shouting, "do we have a problem back there" to which I am shouting back "yes" and pointing to the dude, and the dude is yelling back at the driver "no, we don't have a problem" all the while continuing to yell at me at how he's such a big gangster and he's going to fuck me up, to which I am replying ooooh, I'm scared of the punk on the bus, take me on, you little shit. This lasted for about three stops then the kid gets off the bus (unfortunately so does the Hispanic girl that was next to me, and so he continued to mouth off at her as we pulled away). The guy in front of me turned around and thanked me, saying he was too afraid to say anything! I started laughing, telling him I'm way too old to have to take the punk's shit, and that I'm generally not afraid of guys like that on the bus. If a guy is really packing a weapon, he doesn't shout it out loud for all to hear. Usually, guys like that couldn't connect on a punch, and I've had my share of fights that I know where to connect, be it with my fist, my foot, or a simple head butt! I may be little but I swing a mean right!

But, most of the time, the riding on the Metro is uneventful, even fun, like the time I was with Zaire who had just played that machine that you put money in and then try to grab something with the tongs. Mostly you loose your money cuz it never picks anything up. But Zaire actually got this bear with a UCLA shirt on it. Now, I'm a USC fan, so I was all ugh, get that bear away from me. So, we get on the bus, and go to the back, and there was an unusual number of elderly men all in the back going to the Veterans Hospital for something. They see Zaire and his UCLA bear, and then starts the smack talking back and forth between the USC and the UCLA fans! It was fun, especially for Zaire, to be interacting like that. The guys were cool and we had the whole half of the bus picking sides! Now, that's something that one would not experience driving alone in your car from point A to point B!

McCain Thinks Teacher Pay Is Pork, But Raytheon Makes Wonderful Missles And They Need A Tax Break!

Arizona's first debate for the Republican primary race had a few memorable moments but none summed up the Republican Party's view on what is "pork" and what they consider their priorities on spending than than this bit by John McCain. Spending for teachers, it's pork, but we need to keep that military industrial complex going and make sure that the people "making those wonderful missiles"... the "job creators", have their taxes cut.

"Wonderful missiles"... I can't believe he said that, but he did. I can't think of a single reason to call missiles "wonderful" unless you think dropping bombs on people's heads is a "wonderful" thing. There's an argument to be made for "necessary" for civil defense which I'm not going to get into the weeds on here since IMO we're over-armed to a ridiculous extent for what's actually necessary for civil defense and have been for some time now, but "wonderful"?

Crooks and Liars covered the Arizona Republican Senate Primary debate. The above came from our dear stupid Senator McCain, you know, the one that used to be a maverick and ran for president once upon a time with that twit Palin.

What is up with these guys? On one show, the Stupid Republicans say they "stand with the rest of America," but over here on another channel, the Stupid Republicans call salaries for teachers ... TEACHERS, "pork" and equate the big war profiteering corporations that make those "wonderful" bombs worthy of TAX CUTS? What happened to balancing the budget or paying for tax cuts? What, are you STUPID?

Obama's Debt And Deficit Commission Speaks

Bowles said that unlike the current economic crisis, which was largely unforeseen before it hit in fall 2008, the coming fiscal calamity is staring the country in the face. "This one is as clear as a bell," he said. "This debt is like a cancer."

Once again, the stupid saying stupid things. "... largely unforeseen before it hit in fall 2008 ..."

Ummmm, NOT. Not a true statement in any fashion. And as may of us have been saying, if you want to fix the deficit, STOP PLAYING WAR. Don't mess with Social Security, education, or other programs ... stop funding war and sending money, huge, HUGE amounts of taxpayer dollars, to countries that you demonize, that you hate, and that you actually fantasize you can turn into little Christian puppet governments! STOP, STOP, STOP!

Faux News

"The Taliban know that Kandahar is the key to success or failure," McCain told a news conference at the airport in Kabul.

Sorry. I am awfully close to breaching internet protocols here.

Who Is Running The Hen House?

From Think Progress:

Transocean, Ltd., the giant oil contractor that leased its Deepwater Horizon rig to BP, held a “closed-door meeting” with shareholders Friday, “just days after” executives appeared before Congress to explain the company’s role in the massive Gulf of Mexico oil spill. As ThinkProgress noted, the meeting took place at the company’s headquarters in Zug, Switzerland, where Transocean relocated two years ago to avoid paying taxes. Though CEO Steven Newman “ignored questions from reporters,” the company said in a statement that it would distribute $1 billion in dividends to shareholders:

The revelation that Transocean is distributing a $1 billion profit to shareholders as one of its drill sites leaks millions of gallons of oil into the sea is sure to inflame an already smarting debate over offshore drilling and the company’s role.[...]

To put the distribution in perspective, the amount of profit that Transocean plans to pay out in the next year is half of what Exxon ultimately paid for the Exxon Valdez disaster off the Alaska Coast.

It’s also more than double what BP has said they’ve spent on the cleanup to date.

Meanwhile, Transocean has “passionately argued” to limit its financial responsibility for the disaster. The company filed a court request last week to cap its liability under $27 million, a paltry sum considering BP has already spent over $450 million on cleanup, and analysts estimate the effort could ultimately cost up to $8 billion. As Raw Story notes, Transocean has actually made money from the disaster, collecting over $400 million from insurers, leaving it with a profit of $270 million after the costs of the rig are subtracted. As maritime attorney Jeff Seely told NPR, “They are the only people who have been compensated for this tragedy. The decedents [of the 11 workers killed in an explosion on the rig] haven’t been the compensated. The injured people who still are suffering, all the fishermen out in the Gulf that can no longer work haven’t been compensated.”

I am at a total loss as to how to put my brain around this. Pay out a billion dollars to the shareholders, now, COLLECT the insurance money, now, have your lobbyists try to limit your liability to others to just twenty-seven million dollars NOW -- but don't give any money to the survivors of the blown-up mother fucking rig, don't give any money to the relatives of those killed from the blown-up mother fucking rig, and above all else, deny culpability.

The piece last night on 60 minutes was an eye-opener. See it here.

The top Interior Department official who oversees offshore oil and gas drilling for the Minerals Management Service will retire on May 31, The Washington Post has learned.

Too little, too late. And to top it off, the stupid, STUPID, stupid Obama administration has put Jonathan I. Katz (called by this administration "one of the best scientific minds") with three others on a panel to look into the BP oil spill and to stop it.

Who is Jonathan I. Katz, you ask? Well, global warming denier, to start off with:

Who is stoking the alarm about global warming? There is Al Gore, an over-the-hill politician who wants to remain in the public eye. His house uses 20 times as much electricity as the average American house and he flies private jets. Obviously, he does not believe what he preaches; it must be an act.

Secondly, an avowed homophobe:

In Defense of Homophobia

Jonathan I. Katz

Homophobia is the moral judgement that homosexual behavior (most of the arguments in this essay refer specifically to male homosexual behavior) is wrong. Homophobia is not like ethnic, racial or religious prejudice, which deny the intrinsic moral rights and value of other people. Rather, it is a moral judgement upon acts engaged in by choice.

Spelling errors left intact!

One of the best scientific minds so says the Obama administration. (scratching head on this one). In what way, say I? Believes global warming is a hoax, yeah, that's up there with the rest of the "best scientific minds." Homophobia is ok and is simply a moral "judgment?" Like cooties? And people who wipe their boogers on walls?

I said it before, and I'll say it again. You really know we are in trouble when the POTUS cannot discern the smart people from the idiots.

UPDATE ALERT: Katz has been dropped from this panel.

Jonathan I. Katz, a professor of astrophysics at Washington University in St. Louis, ''will no longer be involved in the [Energy] Department's efforts'' at addressing the oil spill continuing to spread in the Gulf of Mexico, a Department spokeswoman relayed on Monday night, May 17.

The news came after what the spokesperson, Stephanie Mueller, termed ''controversial writings'' – which included a ''defense of homophobia'' – spread out over the web on Monday, writings of which she said the Department was unaware when it sought his assistance.

Oy, What A Day I Had Today!

I will have comments on the events going on today with the teabaggers (LOL) and their outlandish and vitriolic appearance on Capitol Hill, tomorrow.

Today was a fucking hard day.

First off, not that anyone gives a shit, but my right knee suffered a torn meniscus, and mind you, my chiropractor caused it by the exercise he made me do. So, good thing, it is not the kind of tear that will require surgery. Bad thing, I have pain constantly, have to take anti-inflammatory medicine, (like Ben Gay and Motrin) and do certain quad exercises to strengthen the muscles surrounding he knee.

Anyway, I had an appointment to see an optometrist to get clear my vision options. My glasses suck, cuz they are scratched beyond repair. I haven't worn contacts in five years since I discovered I can't see without reading glasses the fine print. So I opted for wearing my last pair of glasses (and trust me, they were $300 on sale, damn it).

The visit was about four fucking hours at the Lens Crafter, which despite the time parameters, was still cheaper than if I went back to my regular high end optometrist.

Unfortunately, I cannot wear the bifocal contacts, so I had to settle for a new pair of glasses, with bifocal lenses and with a darkening screen that acts like sunglasses (so much for having bangs again, damn it).

I thought it was interesting that they took my blood pressure, which registered at 187 over 114 ... talk about panic attacks!

I took four Valium, and it still registered 187, damn!

But, the most important part was that I had my grandson. I told my daughter that I couldn't take him this weekend because I had this doctor visit and other stuff, but she was adamant I had to take him because (1) her best friend was having a shower for her third baby out of wedlock (who the hell keeps having sex with turds that get you preggers and aren't around .. or, my daughters friends, LOL), and (2) she wanted me to prep the grandkid for his first presentation orally on a project before the class ... like I really had the time for it.

So, the doctor visit was four hours, not like one hour, and I have to give props to the grandkid for behaving properly. But he was hungry, and since the cost overrun depleted what I had brought with me such that I had to go home first before I could actually buy food for dinner, it was stressful.

Now, I am all for public transit, but today was a bitch, and nothing was working right. So, I waited an hour for a bus that never came, all the while my grandson was telling me he was hungry. Talk about raising your blood pressure.

When I telephoned my daughter, she was at my house, working on putting finishing touches on the "presentation" that Zaire was supposed to make on Monday. When I told her of my predicament, she said she'd go to the store.

But when I got home, she hadn't gone to the store. She, instead, fed herself, and then decided she was going to fight with me over what Zaire wanted for dinner (pizza, micro version or baked version ...since she has decided to toss her microwave, she was adamant she was buying the 30 minute bake version, despite the fact the kid hadn't eaten in like 8 hours).

So, while she went to the store, I laid down in the dark to try to help my BP lower, and I even told Zaire I wasn't going to sleep, I was just resting trying to lower the BP. In fact, I heard him tell his mom that "grandma is resting lowering her BP." Next thing I hear is my daughter saying she and Zaire are leaving ... and she took the pizza (laughs).

Y0u know, sometimes you have a child that gives a shit about you, and then you have my daughter.

Time for me to just be the part time grandparent, as much as I love Zaire. My daughter treats me like the weekly babysitter. End of that routine.

I love my grandson, but my daughter is really just a thoughtless bitch, and I am done with it.